WHy do I feel like this? How can i get help?

it sounds like an addiction. the only way to fix it is to replace it. When you eat do a few sit ups or something every time you indulge. What the goal is here is that you change the pattern of eating to not just foods gratification but to some other things less desirable that you ociate that type with eating so that the desire is split between eating and the action habit you do behind it. your brain will balance out your diet for you. You eat normal small meals do nothing. High cal meals do a chore around the house or wash your car always ociate something with that action.That's different for eating a healthy meal no matter what you do just something different right after the junk food rubber band something. It will balance out..